Thursday, June 29, 2006

Word To The Links.

Hey - good news, los guapos. That network overhaul I'd mentioned in the previous post? Done. Who's the Mac Daddy Pimp? Daaaat's right, yo. Say my name! Hustle & Flow. Holla.

Now that we got the Ebonics out of the way, the posts can begin anew. Good thing too because, as you'll see in the previous posts' comments, people are starting to bitch. Fair warning, however. Although the project is done, there are still remnants of exhaustion. Plus, when one doesn't write for awhile, one tends to find themselves plumb out of ideas. Just thought I'd let you know. But that aside, we're together again and it's time to enjoy each others company once more. So... what would you like to talk about? Pop... Pop... Pop Muzik? My beloved Boston Red Sox? The upcoming 4th of July holiday and crazy fireworks that will ensue? Sister Sledge? The fact that my toenails need cutting?

Alright, this is ridiculous. I'm quickly getting bored, and my mind still isn't working right. Howza 'bout we resurrect an old Friday tradition and say hello to some links? Good? Tough. You have no choice. I'm the author here, Whiney McWhinesashitload. Links it is.

Listo? Empieze.

We start things off with a rather profane photoshop contest. It is my understanding that our neighbors across the Atlantic are updating their highway code but, as the site mentions, they've neglected to update their road signs yet. Perhaps just a slight oversight. Anyway, the folks at B3ta decided to host a redo the road signs photoshop contest with some pretty funny results. (Warning: some of you may find them more than a bit offensive as well.) My favorite is, without question, the Love Shack. Clickee here.

In keeping with the photo theme, we have a set of pictures that I truly wish were photoshopped, but sadly are not. Ghetto Prom 2003 provides a little insight into what the kidz are wearing to the ho-downs these days. Love the fact that the "red carpet" is, in fact, a tarp.

Here's a link to a Canadian Broadcasting Corporation's science show Quirks & Quarks. This particular show deals with the "science of happiness." And no, I'm not talking about the wacko Tom Cruise and his no pills for depression, let me kill Oprah and pretend I'm not gay Scientology version. That's not science, my friends. Or, at least we of the "L. Ron is whack" fan club say it isn't. No, this is more like the sciencey type of science that you were taught in high school. Er... I think it is anyway. I downloaded the program but didn't actually manage to get past the first two minutes before trying to slit my wrists. I think I must have fast-forwarded to the part about the blind chickens (see the link... I'm really not that crazy.) Anyway, you can download the whole Quirks and Quarks program or simply the "happiness" segment. 'Tis up to you. Either way, make sure you pay attention to the Question of the Week segment at the end (also available for separate download at the bottom of the page) as it tackles the age-old conundrum, "Why does our piss smell so foul after we eat asparagus?" Now, let's get happy! Cue R.E.M please.

This next section is devoted entirely to YouTube. They've provided me with so much entertainment over the past year that I think they're definitely deserving of their own space on this post. Sadly, as time doesn't permit, I won't be embedding all the videos in the post this time around. You'll just have to click the links.

10 Things I Hate About Commandments - A brilliant mashup and one which shows just how tired the movie trailer formula is getting. One of my all time favorites.

More mashups. These two are taken from The Big Lebowski - a film which I simply loathe, but which everyone, and I do mean EVERYONE, else I know adores. I'm convinced it must just be me. The first, and best, mashup was done with an old He-Man cartoon. I can't overstate how much I loved this cartoon growing up. I also can't overstate how embarrassed I now am for having just admitted that. Anyway, I think I like The Big Lebowski version even better. The second mashup was done with a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon and is really rather sub par. I included it because... well, because.

This is what happens when you let crazy people into a city council meeting and allow them to be an active part of the political process. This country is going to hell. Fight the power, and note the 80's hair-do while you're at it. Very funny/scary.

Alright - I gotta take T's. I'm all out of breath. I could be here all night posting YouTube videos, but that would make for a VERY long post. If you've got a good amount of time to kill (and I'm guessing you do. You're reading this blog, aren't you?) then check out The Sports Guy's homage to the best of YouTube (with links and witty commentary!) Some great stuff.

For you Star Wars junkies out there, we have the Yoda backpack and Star Wars inspired tattoo's (is that the plural of tattoo? Is it, perhaps, tattooes? Maybe just tattoos? We may never know. Ze plane! Ze plane!) Anyway guys, pay attention to those links. Perfect for pickin' up them ladyfolk.

Another new innovation from the wacky folks at Google. This time, it's Google Checkout. I think it's a Paypal like service, but I also think it will hold your credit card info and allow you to pay on lots of different websites with just the Google Checkout account... which is... kind of what... Paypal does... Anyhoo - I haven't signed up. Probably won't either, but some of you folks out there might like it.

This next link is stolen directly from Sean's blog. I do this often, but he posts awesome links so, there you go. This link is no exception. 90 bazillion 80's music videos are anxiously awaiting your clickage. I mean, c'mon they have "We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off" by Jermaine Stewart! I didn't even know that was sung by a Jermaine. I thought it was a woman, or maybe New Edition before they all hit puberty - you know, the Candy Girl days. Oh yeah, that video is there too (note all the Boston landmarks! The Esplanade, the Hancock tower, the North Station thugs... ah... the innocence of days gone by.) And yeah, I technically should have included this in the YouTube section but this was just too special.

As is this... just a RIDICULOUS selection of full length cartoons. Virtually everything is here. Daffy Duck, Dexter's Laboratory, Justice League, Mickey Mouse, South Park. It is in-SANE. Hell, they even have an episode of The Smurfs (although where the hell is the Rocky & Bullwinkle?!? That's only the greatest cartoon of all friggin' time. Arggh!! Still, beggars can't be choosers.) I may have just killed your workday. Apologies.

NNDB aka Big Brother Database - or as they put it, "an intelligence aggregator that tracks the activities of people we have determined to be noteworthy, both living and dead." It's actually pretty fun. It goes on to say that "it mostly exists to document the connections between people, many of which are not always obvious." For instance... did you know that Frank Zappa slept with Janis Joplin? Yucccck! More information than I needed to know. Think of it as a Six Degrees of *blankity-blank* brought to life. Whee!

Here's a fake identity generator for those sites that require you to sign up, or perhaps for... other... nefarious... purposes. I'm amazed that this kind of thing is actually legal. It even provides a credit card number. Yikes. Forget I mentioned it, will you?

The AFI's (that's American Film Institute, you uneducated heathen) list of the 'Top 100 Most Inspiring Films Of All Time.' Cool list. I was very pleased with their selection for #1

What a brilliant idea. Some woman, realizing that people look dumb when they're posing for pictures, had people pose but then filmed them instead. The result is Long Awkward Pose and the clips are fantastic. (By the way, that dude Anthony who she features about four poses down? I went to college with him, and yeah I was shocked to see him on this site.) Yeah, yeah, fine - technically another YouTube (or variant thereof) link. Can we just forget I gave it it's own section? Seriously, stop complaining. Enough.

Whew. I don't know about you guys, but I am plumb tuckered out! There's your list of useless links for a lazy Friday (oh, and did you notice that that's the 2nd time I used the word "plumb" in this post? Heh. Good word, plumb.) Here's hoping you have a relaxing and enjoyable weekend. I, for one, am going to do nothing except relish in the fact that I don't have to be at work until next Wednesday. Oh, and maybe watch some cartoonz. Yo, dem Smurfs got some mad skillz. True dat. Peace.

[UPDATE 06/30/06 08:35 AM - One more link for all you Red Sox junkies. This one was provided by an anonymous friend in the comments in the previous post. Feeding the Monster is a new book due out on July 11th about the Red Sox 2004 title run. I know - this horse has been beaten to death, so why are we giving it another whack? First, because it's written by none other than Seth Mnookin, local writer extraordinare (and I think a friend of my sister at one point. I, unfortunately, can't make the same claim although I certainly knew who he was growing up, and knew his sister in elementary school.) But, local connections aside, the man is a fantastic writer. I've read a decent amount of his stuff in Vanity Fair and the New Yorker, and I'm really looking forward to this publication. Should be well worth the purchase price. The link provided goes to his blog where you can catch excerpts from the book, as well as his own musings on the Boston Nine and life in general. Thanks Anonymous!

And... good heavens. I just realized I've posted a poorly written links post and not included a single game in the mix... anywhere. Problem solved. Dumb the Game lets you prove yourself undumb by solving a collection of really tricky puzzles. You'll need an account (no personal info is given though... just username, password & email address) but if you like those brain teaser types of things, you'll probably enjoy this. I had enough trouble with just the sample puzzles. Later!]


Anonymous Anonymous said...

did you read that some guy in some other country was arrested for a false id cause he used Tom Cruise's picture. He said he didn't know who TC was....
that makes at least one

3:41 PM  
Blogger Eric said...

Is it wrong for me to hope Tom Cruise will be a victim of identity theft? I think it is... and yet, your story makes me happy - except for the fact that the guy got caught. What a fool. If you're going to get caught being an identity theft, you should at least have enough sense to not use a famous celebrity's photo... not that I would know anything about such matters, of course...

10:51 AM  
Blogger Sean said...

WOO! Those cartoons were super! Chuck Norris? Now that's pretty obscure. And I loved watching the Voltron cartoon WITH Cap'n Crunch commercial. More links please! More! Happy 4th, Eric!

1:59 PM  

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