Friday, October 28, 2005

L-L-L-L-Links!!

It's been quite some time since I had a Friday links post. What do you say we start this old jalopy up again, eh? Let's go.

But first - am I disgruntled? I just got IM'ed (that's instant messaged for you those of you who are, like, SOOOOO out of the loop) from my friend Greg who said, "You sound disgruntled in your blog." Thanks, Greg. Hello yourself. How's the day going? Wife well?

My response was "part of my schtick" - and I guess, in a sense, it is. But really, why do I have to have a schtick? I mean, chances are all five of you would read this space anyway and, to be honest, I don't really feel as if I'm trying on a different persona when I write these posts. I'm just me being me, damnit!! Good Lord - Greg and I were roommates for five years! He of all people should know that "disgruntled", or better yet "curmudgeonly" (disgruntled makes it sound like I'm going to walk into the lobby with an Uzi and go off), might be an appropriate character description. But what if it isn't? What if I'm someone in real life and something completely different when I'm writing these posts? Maybe I'm breaking the wall down, getting rid of the facade and letting the REAL Old Man Eric shine through. And how does one define this duality in real a world context, not just a psychiatric sense (schizophrenia, dumb dumb.)

WHO AM I?!?!? WHO IS THE REAL ME?!?!?!

Screw it - let's try some links.

Choose Your Life - This first link fits in rather well with my identity battle you just read in the paragraph above. According to this survey, I am a demonic, hideous, wretched, unlovable, enslaved, twisted, cranky, skanky, wasted, sickly and faithless person. Let's see if you can do any better. I'm guessing not. Heathens. (FYI - Some sketchy banner ads too - but that's never stopped you before....)

Escape from Rhetundo Island - You know... they had me with the original Hapland. Hapland 2 was even better. It would stand to reason that Hapland 3 would be the best yet. But instead, we get Escape from Rhetundo Island, which is a
thinking man's game. Go figure. I can think. I can think well, actually, but I still can't get past the giant scissors and boulder thing a ding and the pool of fire after it. Eventually I'll break down and look at a cheat sheet... For now though, the battle rages on. Addictive, and frustrating as hell. Flash 8 required. You can get it here.

The Pumpkin Gutter - I was never any good at carving pumpkins. I had the triangle eyes and nose... the weird looking mouth, the cut out circle head... All nonsense... and not at all scary.... and oh, how the things would rot and stick up the place. Yeeeuck. I'm guessing the pumpkin gutter doesn't have that problem. I'm also guessing he has loads of time on his hands. DAT'S some impressive pumpkin carving, yo. Great Pumpkin carving, in fact. Linus would be proud.

Purportal - BOOKMARK THIS PAGE!!! ALL OF YOU!! RIGHT NOW!!! If I get one more e-mail asking me to help find some girl named Penny Brown, or any other fictitious youngster for that matter, I am going to gouge out my retinas and paint the world paisley. Purportal has five different search engines in which to check and see if the old wives tale you've just heard is, in fact, a hoax. Useful tool. Only takes a minute and will save you from looking like a fool in the eyes of the eighty some-odd people you're about to forward the abduction notice to. Oh, like you haven't done that before.....

Meanwhile - Remember those Choose your Own Adventure Books? So do I. In fact, for my 30th birthday my cousin Brian sent me one as a gift. I was, to say the least, flabbergasted. Here's a neat little online one... or it may be big... I actually haven't read the thing, so I can't vouch for it's content. It LOOKS pretty cool however, and it was forwarded to me by a friend, so it may, in fact, be trustworthy. In any case, if you need something to idle away the time..... you'll need lot's of it by the looks of things.. uber-confusing.

Lost In Translation - Cute and somewhat dumb, but I needed a link to throw in here. This is what happens when you translate a phrase in five different languages before turning it back into English. Some amusing results.

Food Defect Action Levels - Ever wonder if that bumblebee in your curry is considered acceptable? Well, wonder no longer!! Here, friend, is the list of natural or unavoidable defects in foods that present no health hazards for humans. It's still repugnant. Yeah, yeah, I know - we all in the same gang.... whateva. I still don't like finding rodent filth in my cocoa powder press cake.

Scrabble - I was never a good scrabble player. Many moons ago my cousin threw the board at me and accused me of cheating for using the word "yelp." I haven't played since. I understand there are some fanatics out there though, and I say more power to them. I truly understand that boats do indeed need to float. I'd even like to help in this process - so here is the go anywhere disposable Scrabble game. Print it out and you're good to go. You're welcome.

Reverse Speech - WAAAAYYY back when I first started this blog I had a post on backwards messages in music. The post was written in jest. This website isn't. Good for a laugh, or a concerned nod of the head... or a Eureka! Again.... boats need to float.

Alfred Hitchcock - Those who know me know it's an understatement to say I'm an Alfred Hitchcock fan. I'm more of an obsessor. OK - maybe not, but he IS my favorite director... by far. And no, I'm not worried about being too trendy, Mister Tim Burton lover. Up until recently however, there had been precious little on the Intarwebs devoted to the poor fat guy. Then I discovered this site. A gem for all Hitchcock fans out there.


Enjoy the links, folks. In my (sort of) absence over the past few weeks, I made sure to keep track of the few, yet interesting sites I'd surfed to - so fear not, young brethren. There are more where these came from. I wish you all a wonderful weekend, and I bid you a hearty and a healthy adeiu (adieu... to you, and you, and yooouuuu.) Until next time.

1 Comments:

Blogger Sean said...

Hey Eric!

If you're a fan of Hitchcock, I must recommend Alfred Hitchcock : A Life in Darkness and Light. It's a fairly recent bio on his life -- there are a lot out there, but I picked this one up after hearing that it was the most colorful and well-rounded, like the man himself. Great read!

Ta!

Sean

PS - Interestingly, Blogger comments won't allow the "title" attribute within the anchor tag. Hmm. I wonder why.

2:14 PM  

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